Old Man Song
Ex-Monk 30 / Rogue 20 / Drunken Master 10
Divine Rank: 15
Hit Dice: 30d8+210 (monk), 20d6+140 (rogue), 10d8+70 (drunken master) (860 hp)
Initiative: +16 (+12 Dex, +4 Improved Initiative)
Speed: 380 ft., fly 760 ft.
AC: 86 (+6 Monk, +2 Drunken Master, +12 Dex, +18 Wis, +15 Divine, +15 Natural, +8 Deflection)
Attacks: +5 keen lawful vorpal unarmed strike +67/+67/+67/+62/+57/+52 melee or Crushing Sky +67/+62/+57/+52 or +5 brilliant energy shocking burst thundering composite longbow +67/+62/+57/+52
Damage: +5 keen lawful vorpal unarmed strike 2d12+15/18-20 or Crushing Sky 3d12+20/+1d10 cold or +5 brilliant energy shocking burst thundering composite longbow 1d8+15+1d6 electric/19-20 +2d10 electric, +1d8 sonic
Face/Reach: 5 ft by 5 ft / 5 ft
Special Attacks: flurry of blows, sneak attack +10d6, ki strike (adamantine), quivering palm (DC 52), corkscrew rush, breath of flame (20 ft cone, 3d12 fire, ref half), superior improvised weapons (3d12+10 or +15), stunning blow (DC 52), Dragon Kick (unique ability; see below)
Special Qualities: divine immunities, DR 65/+5, fire resistance 35, SR 67, understand, speak and read all languages and speak directly to all creatures within 15 miles, remote communication, godly realm, teleport without error at will, plane shift at will, divine aura (1,500 ft, DC 33), improved evasion, empty body, wholeness of body, abundant step, slow fall any distance, trapfinding, improved uncanny dodge, trap sense +6, drink like a demon, stagger, swaying waist, for medicinal purposes, improved improvised weapons, superior improvised weapons
Saves: Fort +56, Ref +61, Will +65
Abilities: Str 30, Dex 40, Con 30, Int 25, Wis 46, Cha 29
Skills: Balance +83, Bluff +32, Climb +73, Escape Artist +56, Hide +50, Jump +219, Listen +50, Move Silently +50, Sleight of Hand +38, Spot +50, Tumble +83
Feats: Improved Unarmed Strike, Stunning Fist, Deflect Arrows, Improved Disarm, Martial Weapon Proficiency (longbow), Improved Critical (longbow), Dodge, Mobility, Spring Attack, Combat Expertise, Whirlwind Attack, Great Fortitude, Exceptional Deflection, Infinite Deflection, Improved Critical (unarmed), Keen Strike, Legendary Leaper, Reflect Arrows, Run, Endurance, Epic Speed, Epic Endurance, Improved Ki Strike, Point Blank Shot, Far Shot, Distant Shot, Defensive Roll, Epic Dodge
Divine Immunities: Ability damage, ability drain, acid, cold, death effects, disintegration, electricity, energy drain, mind-affecting effects, paralysis, poison, sleep, stunning, transmutation, imprisonment, banishment
Salient Divine Abilities: Alter Form, Alter Reality, Alter Size, Clearsight, Divine Celerity, Divine Earth Mastery, Divine Fast Healing, Divine Monk, Free Move, Gift of Life, Increased Damage Reduction, Increased Spell Resistance, Life And Death, Rejuvenation, Stride
Domain Powers: Turn air creatures 15/day, Freedom of Movement for 15 rounds/day
Spell-Like Abilities: Caster level 25, save DC 36 +spell level: Magic stone, soften earth and stone, stone shape, spike stones, wall of stone, stoneskin, earthquake, iron body, elemental swarm, longstrider, locate object, fly, dimension door, teleport, find the path, greater teleport, phase door, astral projection.
Dragon Kick Through extensive exploration of the martial arts, Song has perfected the awesome Dragon Kick. To use this attack, he must charge his opponent (which must be a corporeal creature) and end his move action with a jump, landing in the opponent's square, then hit with an unarmed melee attack, choosing to deal bludgeoning damage (thus negating the keen and vorpal qualities). If he does, the enemy must make a Fortitude save with a DC equal to the total damage Song has dealt to that creature during this encounter, plus Song's Wisdom modifier. If the target fails the save, Song's attack deals maximum damage and full sneak attack damage and automatically scores a critical hit (dealing 10d6+78 points of damage). In addition, the attack deals an additional 1d10 points of damage for every ten feet Song moved toward his opponent that round (3d10 for 30 feet, etc). If the attack deals 140 points or more of damage, a one-foot square hole is blasted all the way through the target (this replaces the unarmed strike's vorpal quality and is just as likely to kill the target outright, regardless of its actual hit points). A successful save results in a normal attack, except that it automatically scores a threat. He can use this attack once per day.
Posessions: Song carries Crushing Sky, a +5 iron quarterstaff with the defending, ki focus, ghost touch and icy burst qualities, and Thunderhead, a +5 composite longbow (+10 Str bonus) with the brilliant energy, shocking burst and thundering qualities. (Crushing Sky is not actually a quarterstaff; it looks like one, but is actually just a long chunk of metal Song found somewhere, so it uses the damage figures for an improvised weapon. This is significant only in that it means he cannot use it as a double weapon. He has since had it enchanted.) His gourd magically refills itself with wine whenever any is removed. This wine acts as any one of the following: potion of cure serious wounds, potion of remove blindness/deafness, potion of remove curse, potion of remove disease, or potion of neutralize poison. Choosing which potion to dispense is a free action that can be used once per round. Only Song can create potions using the gourd.
Titles: Old Man Song, The Drunken Immortal, King of Fighters, Lord of the Gourd
Home Plane: Material
Portfolio: Monks, Travel, Wisdom, Combat, Drinking
Worshipers: monks and ex-monks, rogues, travelers, scholors, drunken boxers
Cleric Alignments: CG, CN, CE, N, LN
Domains: Earth, Travel
Favored Weapon: Unarmed
Song (pronounced sung) was once a mortal man, but became a god some hundreds of years ago. Despite the ‘old man’ moniker, he most often appears lean, muscular and young. During combat, he sometimes seems to age rapidly, although this does not affect his abilities. He is a cheerful, lazy, laid-back deity, although he can also be cunning and guilesome when the situation warrants it. Because of his great wanderlust, he is most often observed walking throughout the planes, taking the occasional drink from his bottomless calabash. He has also been known to spend weeks meditating at the bottom of the ocean. He displays open dislike for Wee Jas and, to a lesser extent, all lawful deities, though he bears no ill will toward lawful mortals. He generally prefers good over evil.
Dogma: Overall, Song promotes peace. Because of his great love of melee combat, however, he cannot resist a good fight, although he seldom deals lethal damage. He encourages his followers to accept the will of the universe without regret and to try to make themselves and others happy. He discourages the use of magic as a shortcut to solving one’s problems, but has no problems with the use of magic in general.
Clergy and Temples: Because of his chaotic nature, as well as his relative obscurity among the intermediate deities, Song has few clerics and fewer temples. His worshipers tend to be ex-monks, who often share his outlook, and monks, who revere him for his sheer skill and accomplishment in the martial arts. Other practitioners of drunken boxing may have heard his name, but as most mortals are ignorant of his very existence, few possess the knowledge that would lead them to worship him.
- Aesthetically, Song's signature fighting style resembles a bizarre hybrid of drunken boxing, muay thai boran and capoeira, with elements of all other martial arts thrown in for good measure in a seemingly random fashion. If the opponent is weak, however, he may elect to not reveal his style at all, choosing instead to simply close with the enemy, strike once, then use his flurry of blows attack in the next round, which will most likely be sufficient.
- As a being who spends much of his time wandering the planes aimlessly, and as someone who was once mortal, Song may well be the friendliest and most accessible true deity there is. He is never in a hurry, and will always stop to chat with PCs if they mean well. He never attacks first unless his enemy is mindless (undead or constructs, for instance) or clearly about to cause much needless suffering (e.g. the tarrasque).
- Owing to its spectacular and lethal nature, the Dragon Kick is not something Song uses every day, though he could if he wanted. It functions best as a "finishing move" against particularly powerful foes. Indeed, any use at all signifies that he respects the opponent enough to go all-out and is therefore quite an honor, if the opponent survives.